July 6, 2007

Vat Ham is always in your blind spot.


I received a compliment on my healthy lunch. It comprised an organic spring mix salad, topped with rasberry and white balsamic (which sucked), topped with grated mozarella. Yum. The complimentor failed to notice my PIECE OF HAM.

This "Ham" is the epitome of what is wrong with what we accept as "food". It was a thinly sliced rectangle of pink, moist, glistening goo with patches of darker pink that look like they might have come from meat at some point. On the scale of Ham quality, this is as low as you can go. It is one step above spam, or its copiers. Its distinguishing feature is that the texture is smooth rather than grainy. This still does not disguise the fact that it was protospam.

This rectangle of "meat" was obviously molded in a tube, and is probably designed to adjust the pallet of the masses to Vat food. Very soon in the future, we will get products such as these that were grown in a Lab. Tissue Culture Gone Awry.

On that note take a look at www.spam.com. This website is awesome in its weirdness. Its scary that it sells.

1 comment:

Alexander said...

Oh Lord Protect me From the evils of the SPAM